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Living with the Risk Taker

Some people are by nature risk takers and that is not always easy for those who love them. It’s made even more difficult if you are not adventurous.

Let me say at this point I do not have an adventurous bone in my body, unless you count writing a novel as adventurous. For me even getting on a plane to fly cross the other side of the world when I had a fear of flying was an adventure. I would struggle if married to an adventurous spirit. Fortunately Mick and I are very similar in our outlook.

But suppose the one you love wants to participate in extreme sports like parachuting, abseiling, bungee jumping, mountain climbing and the like. Alternately they may have a career in a high risk job, think police and fire fighters. That is going to mean stressful times for you. Can you handle the stress?

If you love them and want them to pursue their dreams, then you are faced with a choice. Either you have to accept that life will have a certain amount of stress or you will have to find a way to deal with it. Prayer is often a good source of relieving stress. When our daughter announced she was going to jump out of a plane, I first told her not to tell me till after the event so I wouldn’t worry. Then I realized I would worry anyway, so it was better for her to tell me exactly when and where it was happening so her father and I could pray.

If you decide you cannot cope this way, then it may mean you should not be marrying his person if you are not already married. However something to consider before coming to that conclusion is this. The very fact they are a risk taker may well be part of the reason you love them, because they are so different to you. Either way you need to let them know how you feel and discuss the situation with them and how best for both of you to deal with it.

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