Love, Honor & Respect

It is traditional in the marriage ceremony to make vows to love and honor your husband or wife for all the days of your life. When my husband and I were married, we elected to change the vows ever so slightly – instead of the word obey – we used the phrase: to love, honor and respect each other.


Love is a term that means something a little different to every person who uses it and hears it. For me, love means to care about every aspect of them. I love the person he is, flaws and all and I accept him for who he is. I admit to being less than perfect; it is not always easy to remember that at the end of the day – right, wrong or indifferent – I love my husband even when I am angry with him.


To honor my husband is to acknowledge what he brings to my life. In my case, my husband often gives me the gift of laughter. He gives me the gift of a unique perspective. He brings balance to my cynicism and patience to my temper. He’s given me a better outlook on people and he’s taught me that sometimes, no matter how well we speak, sometimes we don’t always communicate as well as we might like. As part of honoring each other, we strive to make that better between us always.


The respect is a combination of both love and honor; but also a bit more. The respect we share is the support we offer as each of us strives for our goals both personally and as a couple. My husband has always wanted to go back to school and I’ve often encouraged him to do so. He did the same for me when I went back to school. I respect his strengths and his skills. He does the same for me.

The Triad of Marriage

When it comes to marriage, these three ingredients are the primary building blocks of a strong relationship. The fatal flaw that diminishes this threesome is letting any one of them to be diminished over issues of trust, finances, disagreement or other. One of the things I’ve noticed during the tough times we have experienced is that as long as we have these three things between us – our friendship and our relationship can endure the passions of anger and the stress of problems. Our commitment to these three things has been unwavering in the ten years that we have been together and I believe that because of this – we will many more years together.

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About Heather Long

Heather Long is 35 years old and currently lives in Wylie, Texas. She has been a freelance writer for six years. Her husband and she met while working together at America Online over ten years ago. They have a beautiful daughter who just turned five years old. She is learning to read and preparing for kindergarten in the fall. An author of more than 300 articles and 500+ web copy pieces, Heather has also written three books as a ghostwriter. Empty Canoe Publishing accepted a novel of her own. A former horse breeder, Heather used to get most of her exercise outside. In late 2004, early 2005 Heather started studying fitness full time in order to get herself back into shape. Heather worked with a personal trainer for six months and works out regularly. She enjoys shaking up her routine and checking out new exercises. Her current favorites are the treadmill (she walks up to 90 minutes daily) and doing yoga for stretching. She also performs strength training two to three times a week. Her goals include performing in a marathon such as the Walk for Breast Cancer Awareness or Team in Training for Lymphoma research. She enjoys sharing her knowledge and experience through the fitness and marriage blogs.