Marriage & Religion

Do you and your spouse share the same religion? While it may not seem important to some people, to others the sharing and mingling of faith and belief is paramount to the success of a marriage. That is not to suggest that marriages that mix faith do not survive, in fact, quite the opposite.

There are many examples of mixed faith relationships that do quite well and the couple flourishes. But it takes a strong sense of self and a strong sense of respect for the beliefs of others for such a relationship to not be impacted by worshipping separately.

Many religious texts do not espouse the marrying of someone who does not share your beliefs. In fact, in at least one or two, they discuss the fact that those are not real marriages in the eyes of that belief. So if your spouse does not share your beliefs, are you not really married to them in religious sense? Is your relationship a secular union and if so – what is the difference?

I speak from experience here, because my husband and I do not share the same faith. We were both brought up differently and he has strong, tangible beliefs and I have equally strong, tangible beliefs. Surprisingly, or so it would seem to friends of ours, we have never had a conflict over the disparity in our beliefs. When asked, separately, we also apparently gave the same answer as to why we’ve never really had a disagreement on the subject.

My husband and I may have different belief systems, but we are united in our philosophy about religion. Religion, like marriage, is deeply personal. However we were raised, we chose our own faiths through our education, our beliefs and ultimately, our personal faith. While I believe in my truth and I feel my faith very deeply; so to does my husband.

Yet, they are not the same – so, which one of us is right? Which one of us is wrong?

That is the crux of disagreements in mixed faith marriages that embrace different customs and belief systems. The idea that one is right or wrong; when your philosophy does not allow you to respect another person’s beliefs then yes, you’re going to have problems. Now that’s not to say it’s wrong – this is again, a personal choice. If you cannot philosophically accept a different faith for a different person then it’s likely you will experience conflict in a mixed faith marriage.

So when it comes down to matters of faith, how important is it to you that your spouse share your beliefs and faith?

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About Heather Long

Heather Long is 35 years old and currently lives in Wylie, Texas. She has been a freelance writer for six years. Her husband and she met while working together at America Online over ten years ago. They have a beautiful daughter who just turned five years old. She is learning to read and preparing for kindergarten in the fall. An author of more than 300 articles and 500+ web copy pieces, Heather has also written three books as a ghostwriter. Empty Canoe Publishing accepted a novel of her own. A former horse breeder, Heather used to get most of her exercise outside. In late 2004, early 2005 Heather started studying fitness full time in order to get herself back into shape. Heather worked with a personal trainer for six months and works out regularly. She enjoys shaking up her routine and checking out new exercises. Her current favorites are the treadmill (she walks up to 90 minutes daily) and doing yoga for stretching. She also performs strength training two to three times a week. Her goals include performing in a marathon such as the Walk for Breast Cancer Awareness or Team in Training for Lymphoma research. She enjoys sharing her knowledge and experience through the fitness and marriage blogs.