After a brief sojourn onto other topics I’m back with the alphabetical marriage blogs. This time is Ns turn – 1 great one on the positive side and 3 you definitely don’t want in your marriage.
Each person in a marriage needs to be nurturing and supportive of their spouse. To nurture means the care of promoting the development of another person. Nurturing means nourishing, feeding or supporting. This means more than just meeting their physical need with food but nurturing them by encouraging and helping, praising and building them up. It is supporting them in whatever they undertake.
For example Mick is totally supportive of what I write in my blogs and they are things we have talked about and are in agreement about. Similarly I am totally supportive of him in the things he does whether in ministry or at home or wherever.
Of course we also each need to be nurturing of our marriage, which mens working at it.
The narcissistic person is obsessed with his or her own attributes and as a result is anything but nurturing. The narcissistic personality can be very hard to deal with and to live with because they only ever see things from their own point of view and never consider the needs of others. Beth has a lot more to say about the narcissist personality. You’ll find it here.
Narcissistic people can also be prone to our next N – negativity.
Negativity s like a cancer that eats away at a marriage. Instead of encouraging and building their spouse up, this type of person is quick with the negative comments and criticisms about their spouse either to their face or to others about them. Remember that the chief cause of divorce is not being appreciated. Negativity undermines appreciation and marriage at every turn.
Along similar lines is this one, but taking it one step further is neglect. Neglect of your spouse can be detrimental in a marriage, whether it is neglect through to too much time attention to work or through too many outside interests, or simply because one person doesn’t value their spouse enough to want to spend time with them. Marriages end up in trouble when one partner is neglected.