I recently wrote about children needing to learn to respect their elders. We need to take advantage of all teachable moments. As a single mother there may already be so much on your to do list that one more thing will push you over the edge but we are their first teacher and need to be aware of it.
Our children will learn by what they see us do. If we are rude to salespeople, waitresses or telemarketers we are telling our children it’s ok to be rude to other people. It’s hard after working all day, coming home to kids who are clamoring for your attention, trying to make dinner, trying to help with homework, and the phone is ringing off the hook.
If you really don’t have the patience for it, don’t answer the phone during that time. When I was first divorced everyone knew that the two hours immediately after I got home where for Hailey. We made dinner, talked about our day and just spent time in each others company. I was too busy trying to be everything to Hailey at that moment to talk to anyone else, so I didn’t answer the phone.
If you are looking for something to do with the kids that is cheap or even free, think of doing something for someone else. In the winter you can bake cookies for a neighbor who’s husband helps you with the lawnmower in the summer. Take your kids to a nursing home or to visit an elderly neighbor and let them read to their new friend. Not only are they learning to be of service to others, they are improving their reading skills. In the spring and summer you can pull weeds for a neighbor, walk their dog when they are ill, or just sweep the driveway for them.
There are so many opportunities to serve others and the benefits to you and your children are numerous. The most important thing is that you are together. Some of the best laughs Hailey and I have had are when we were working on projects together.
In addition to spending time together your children will be exposed to other people with different needs. They will learn to be compassionate and empathetic. If a child sees someone in a wheelchair they may stare but if they regularly take the mail to their neighbor who is in a wheelchair they come to understand there is nothing to be afraid of and may offer to help someone in need one day.
Kids need to learn that the world doesn’t revolve around them but they also need to see how very fortunate they are, especially in this materialistic world. Doing things for someone who can’t do them for themselves reminds us how very blessed we are, and makes all us, children and parents, better human beings.