Punishing the Crimes and Misdemeanors of Poop Offenders

Earlier this month Aimee wrote an article entitled The Pick-Up Police. I loved it. Mostly because for a long while now I’ve been experiencing the same frustration in my neighborhood. (Other dog owners not picking up after their dogs.)

Another thing I particularly liked in Aimee’s article was her proactive approach for finding ways to encourage people to pick up after their dogs. Some were cheeky suggestions, sure, but then again…she just might be on to something.

The one I can’t get out of my mind is her skewer suggestion.

“I’ve thought about buying a pack of kebab skewers and flagging every pile I see. Maybe even put a little sign up: please pick up after your pet!”

~-From Aimee Amodio’s “The Pick-Up Police”-~

My mom and I were in Walmart the other day and I saw a 100 pack of wood skewers for 97 cents. Aimee immediately popped to mind.

I’ve long been thinking of super creative ways to let people know it’s not okay to leave their dog’s doo-doo behind. I could actually see me enrolling my mom’s help in making little signs, attaching them to the skewers, and then carrying them in a little quiver akin to the kind used to tote around arrows.

I can see it now. Where Aimee’s the Poop Police in her neck of the woods, I’ll become a sort of Courtie Hood in mine.

And since I’ve ventured into the realm of the ridiculous, here’s some of the more far-fetched “Pick Up Your Dog’s Poop” ideas I came up with:

• Posting a sign in my yard that says something to the effect: “Area under surveillance. Leave poop behind at your own risk. Offenders will be prosecuted accordingly.”

• Keeping tabs on non-poop picking up offenders in the neighborhood and creating a special flyer for them. One that reads: “I know what you didn’t do on your last walk.” Then I’d stick it on their door every time they failed to bag that poo.

• Picking up stray poops like Aimee does, but noting whose dog it belongs to and dropping the bag on the person’s lawn for them to dispose of.

• Putting signs in the yards of all those who let their dogs defile other people’s lawns that says “Poop Zone: All Dogs Welcome to Do Their Dooty Here.”

• Printing up invoices for outrageous fees –like $100 Shoe Cleaning Charge after I stepped in your dog’s pile, or $20 Bag Fee for me cleaning up after your dog– and sending it to them.

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Photo credit: sxc Standard restrictions apply for use of this photo.