When two people meet, enjoy each other’s company and find themselves in what we call a relationship there will inevitably come a time when one or both of the couple feel like something is missing. This is as natural to the evolution of relationships as the first date, the first kiss, the first fight and the first make-up. While counseling might be the politically correct way to handle issues that seem beyond a person, the first stop in relationship counseling is to take care of yourself.
Relationships are a two-person thing. No person can tell another what is best for them, what works for them, how to handle their emotions or what insecurities they are experiencing. So the first step in any relationship issues to make sure you work on you. The truth is we bring who we are into our relationships, if we are unhappy – another person can’t just snap their fingers and make us happy. If we’re uncertain, if we don’t trust them, if we have massive doubts about their sincerity, they can’t undo that.
As we mature from children to teenagers to adults, our relationships mature and change. What we find attractive in others when we are in our teens may not remain attractive in our late twenties and early thirties. The key to knowing if you and your partner are working well together is to always work on yourself. Relationships are about people, not self-help books or the back cover of a romance novel.
Relationship counseling starts by being happy, two happy people together are more likely to be happy in each other than they are if they are miserable. Does this mean you can’t share your problems with your partner? Of course you can share your problems, confide in them and tell them your secrets, but you can’t fix all their problems nor can they fix all of yours. Support, love and respect are fundamental in relationships.
How do you and your spouse support each other?