I don’t really get into New Year’s Resolutions but I do like to set goals for the New Year. I typically spend some time evaluating all the important areas of my life and set one or two goals.
Obviously one of the most important areas of my life is my children. I love being a mom. It has its challenges, especially with the ages they are right now but I wouldn’t trade this for anything. Yet I know that things can always be better so as I look to 2011 I have some things in mind.
This year one of the things that I am going to do differently is to set goals specific to each child. I will still set goals for one or two changes I want to make as a mother in general. But then I will set specific goals for each of my children.
The reason I only set one or two goals is because I want to not make this doable and I want to focus on what’s most important. I can come up with a list of 10 or more things I am sure but that’s not realistic. It will feel too overwhelming and I won’t be honing in on the most important areas that need change.
I am thinking of my 6th grader right now and know immediately that I will work on patience with him. While patience can be a struggle in general, I know that I greatly lack it with him. I am too quick to jump on him. I am too quick to react. I need to do a better job at responding.
While these goals are great, they won’t do much good if we simply tuck them away. So I also suggest that if you are going to set specific goals you post them somewhere you can be reminded. If you don’t want your family to see them, put them in a place that only you will see it.
However if you want to be real bold, tell your child what changes you want to make and ask them to hold you accountable. I could tell my 6th grader about my desire to be more patient with him and ask him to remind me when I am not doing that. Some parents have a hard time with the whole idea of children holding them accountable but it can be a very humbling experience.
What goals do you want to set? Take time to examine your relationship with each of your children and come up with something specific that will help strengthen the bonds.