Should You Stay or Should You Go When He Cheats

Girl biting nailIf you just found out your husband is cheating you may wonder what in the world you are going to do now. He might tell you that he doesn’t want to lose you and that he wishes he had never done it, but how do you know for sure?

You don’t want to be one of those women who stays with their husband while he continues to cheat but at the same time, what if he really does mean it and won’t ever cheat on you again? You don’t want to walk away from a marriage that you’ve been faithful and invested in for so long.

Don’t Base Your Decision on Emotions

Deciding whether you should stay or go after he cheats is a very hard decision to make. You don’t want to make it on a whim and you don’t want to make it based on heightened emotions.

Instead, it’s important that you take time to let the smoke clear and let your mind come to terms with what happened. This is the only way that you will make a decision that is truly what you want to do rather than making a decision on what you think you should do.

Don’t Base Your Decision on What Others Believe

It’s also important to try not to let others influence your decision. Society says, “He cheats and you leave.” While this does usually happen, it’s not what happens all the time.

Many marriages survive infidelity. They go on to being better marriages because of the impact of the trauma that it has incurred. While it’s not easy to get over such a huge marital blunder, it is possible and does happen.

Base It on the You and Your Husband’s Commitment

It can only happen though if you and your husband are committed to it. That’s the only way you will know if its going to work. If you are through with your husband, it will make it virtually impossible to get through everything you must get through during recovery.

The same thing goes with your husband. Your husband must be completely focused on the marriage, be completely done with the affair and committed to doing whatever needs to be done to repair the relationship.

Which Will Make You Happier?

Think about this as you are trying to make the decision of whether you should divorce or reconcile. Don’t make a decision when you aren’t sure and don’t make it when you are in the heights of the emotional turmoil that comes from infidelity. Either way you go, you’ll be dealing with trauma but you want to go the way that will maximize your happiness in the end.

Image: africa /