Statistics specific to single parent are a little frightening. For instance, in the past 36 years, the number of children coming from a single parent home has increased by 50%. If you were to take the history of divorce and conduct new calculations based on the future, you would see that predictions show that as many as 70% of all children born since 1980 will spend time in a single parent home, prior to turning 18! While disturbing, the thing to remember is that you and the children can survive divorce or death by knowing how.
Even if there is anger over the divorce, you need to take the lead by setting the tone or attitude of the home. If you are angry, then the children will pick up on this, likely becoming angry themselves. If you need to vent, find a close friend and let it all out but never to the children. Remember, most kids love both mom and dad very much. Therefore, when you show hurt and anger in the home, they feel torn and in fact, some children will defend the other parent.
Keep in mind that being a single parent usually means dealing with a much larger overload. Obviously, this burden can often be overwhelming, covering things such as daily living, finances, errands, getting the children back and forth from school and/or activities, and so on. Yes, this is tough but rather than feeling defeated, I would strongly recommend you link up with other responsible single parents, creating car pools.
You will also find that some children that are now faced with living with just one parent will become aggressive or bossy. To the children, this move has put them in a different role, one they do not understand or even want. Therefore, you will need to set realistic goals and boundaries, making sure that you are still the boss even though the other parent is not immediately in the picture. Typically, this means more of a load to you at first but by establishing clear expectations and guidelines, the children will soon fall into a pattern.
The most important thing you need to do to survive single parenting is to create a loving, nurturing, and safe home for the children. Many times, children from a divorced home go through a period of feeling as if the ground has been yanked out from under them. They no longer feel secure and may even feel as if they are not loved as much as they were before, taking the blame for the divorce. Of all times, this is the most important for making your children feel secure by providing them with a stable home. Create routines and then be open to listening to your children, even when they say things that hurt. After all, they too need an outlet.
Finally, do not forget about YOU! Often, the children will take up the majority of your time and effort, which means that something has to give. For this reason, we usually see the parent not taking adequate down time, which is crucial. The way you can conquer this challenge is to make sure you set time aside for you to go out, read a book, have your hair done, or visit with friends. Although you may not have the same amount of time as before, use resources so you can have a break. The result will be you being less stressed, thus making the kids feel less stressed.