This is a continuation of Teaching Our Children Modesty.
In addition to modesty, it’s important for our children to understand self-respect. In the same way we’ve shared modesty with our older son (our younger son is still very young), we plan to further elaborate on self-respect and respect for others. My hope is that we will be able to teach our boys how to be respectful toward their young lady peers so they are less likely to find a girlfriend who will be of too much temptation to sin by her influence of provocative actions and appearance. One way to go about teaching this is to point out when we see or hear of something inappropriate.
If you have a teen that has accepted Christ, it’s good to make sure they understand their body is temple. It’s important for us to monitor what we see, hear, where we go, what we say and who we associate with. It’s important to respect others’ bodies too. I don’t think that abstinence can be over emphasized either. It’s important that your teen especially understands that God designed sex for marriage. There are often scary consequences for sex outside of marriage that can range from emotional harm to physical. Be honest with your teen about these issues.
God divinely instituted family with a mother and a father. I believe in doing so has given us responsibilities in teaching our children in different ways. For example, dads have a major role in their little girl’s lives. How a dad sees his daughter can have a lasting impression on how she sees herself. It is possible that girls who have absent fathers may seek out that protective role in other men who may not be healthy choices in relationships. She may be more inclined to buy into the, “you’re so beautiful” line that a man might give her with wrong motives. If a little girl grows up feeling like dad’s princess, I believe she is more likely to hold men to the higher standard as her dad has held her to.
I don’t believe it’s too much different for boys either. I think the way their mom’s view them may determine their degree of self confidence and respect toward other women. I believe a man that has disrespect for his mother is more likely to have disrespect for his wife. I personally believe boys should be taught how to be respectful to a lady at a young age. For example, my super little muscle men are always eager to open the doors at the mall for me. They are always shown appreciation with a big, “Why, thank you Sir. You sure are a strong gentleman!”
I believe it’s our job to help teach our kids to have self-respect. My hope is that the more our children feel respect for themselves, the more they will respect others as Christ would have them do.