The Widows of 9/11: Already Remarrying?

Today is a sad day in American History. Who doesn’t remember where they were this day six years ago when the world as we knew it changed forever?

No matter where we were, we were all affected, yes. But there are some who were affected much more than others. Those who lived in New York, or in Washington, or who had loved ones on any of the planes that went down.

I got to thinking about the widows of 9/11 after reading an article in Woman’s World about one who found love again. A love that has since led to a second marriage.

At first I was appalled. So soon? It’s only been six years. (Admittedly, this is coming from someone who was with her husband nine years before we got married. Therefore, my sense of dating/engagements/reasonable time for getting remarried might be skewed.) And why the heck is she touting it to the whole world? That seems kind of wrong.

But then Heather Long, a blogger many of you are familiar with who also happens to be our Managing Editor, sent out an email yesterday addressing the way she planned to handle today’s anniversary in her fitness blog. (See: Taking Back 9-11.) She urged the rest of us bloggers to consider making an effort to remember it in a positive light too.

We cannot forget what was lost that day, we cannot forget that day — I know that I can’t, but I want to give us something to look forward to as well.
~-Heather Long-~

I went back and reread the Woman’s World article with fresh eyes. This time around I noticed how the widow kept emphasizing that, yes, the decision to date had been a hard one for her. She hadn’t even given any thought to that for two years after her husband’s death, but then in the most unexpected way here was a new man in her life. Yet, she’d found him in a place where she had fond memories of her husband, a romantic Italian restaurant.

She reasoned it was a sign and that her deceased husband was actually guiding her to her new love. That he wouldn’t want her to spend the rest of her life sad and lonely. That she still had a lot of love to give and receive and he didn’t want to see it –or her– wasted. She believed his ultimate blessing came the day of her engagement party when a double rainbow formed over her house.

Judging from the smile she’s giving in the picture with her new husband and daughter from her first marriage, this woman is indeed genuinely happy.

I realized, thanks in part to Heather, that staying sad and fearful and forever in mourning unable to share love again would be the ultimate tragedy of 9/11. The widow who found another to love is not disrespecting her lost marriage by bragging about her new one. She’s not bragging at all. She’s showing not only herself and her daughter, but the rest of us as well, that even with so much heartbreak and sorrow it’s possible for Love to heal. For Love to find you again. And even for Love to light the way.

It’s a good example of someone taking back the day. Of someone not dwelling on what was taken from her, but what she was led to and given instead. She’ll never forget her first husband, and apparently he didn’t forget her either. He made sure to match her with someone who would give her the love he no longer could. Now that’s what I call the power of Love.

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