One of the first decisions I made when I found out I was pregnant with twins was that I was never going to dress my girls alike. It was important to me for them to establish their own identities, and I believed dressing them differently would help to begin the process. Than came the baby shower.
Every gift I received contained two matching items from blankets and sleepers to hats and dresses. They were all adorable. I caved a little. I thought that I could use the outfits on the babies on separate days, but then thought it would be odd to have one girl in an outfit on one day, and the other in the same outfit a few days later. And, okay, I started to picture two tiny girls nestled side-by-side wearing matching pink dresses.
When the girls were born we were busy with two diaper changes, two bottle feedings, two burpings, two baths, and two of all the little things it takes to care for a newborn. Taking the girls out by myself could be a challenge in and of itself so when it came time to do some shopping, I took the easy road. Usually I just chose two of whatever caught my eye. I also hated when I found one really cute outfit, and couldn’t find a second equally cute outfit. In this case I always found myself buying two.
I have to admit, too, that I enjoyed the fuss people made over the girls when we went out with them dressed in similar outfits. I know many parents of twins who don’t appreciate the fact that everyone stops to admire their children. I don’t fall into this category. I was feeling a little isolated being home alone with two babies all day, and I liked nothing better than to have another adult to talk to – even if it was an elderly woman who stopped to admire my two peas in a pod.
I haven’t completely given up on the notion of dressing the girls differently to help them establish their own sense of self. I have come to a conclusion, though. It just wasn’t that important when the girls were infants. Now that they’re approaching two and a half, they’re establishing their own personalities all by themselves. This includes picking out clothes. Just the other day as I went to put a pink shirt on one of my daughters she told me, “No, Mommy, I want the purple one!”. My girls don’t need me to show off their individuality. They can do it all by themselves.