We Are So Different

If you read my last entry you would know that I found my kids biological mother on face book and attempted to see if she wanted to restart updates and pictures. If she did want it I wanted something from her. I want medical history forms for her and all three of the kid’s biological fathers. The kids deserve to have that information to be able to give to their doctors. I am still not sure if I should reestablish the updates with her. She has not shown she deserves it or even wants it but I try to look at it as if it was me that did not have my kids with me would I want it? Yes, of course I would but then again I would never lose custody of my kids so we are different.

I keep trying to look at the situation from my point of view that is so different from hers. Am I expecting too much from her? I think given what I know about what happened she owes the kids at least the knowledge of their medical history, birth information and that kind of information. I would think if I was her I would do anything to find out about my kids I did not carry the kids in my tummy and I cannot imagine not knowing about them.

I may have stirred the pot by asking her for information and offering the updates again. I hope I did not but I must admit I am a little nervous. I used to worry that she would find out where we are living and show up at our door or the kids’ school. I know that sounds illogical but it was a big fear for me for a while. I have gotten better with it but she never showed good judgment in her own life or who she chose to share her life with so who knows what she would do.

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About Tammy Woolard

My name is Tammy and I am 40 year old mother of 3 wonderful children who came to us through domestic adoption. Although we did not have any fertility issues we chose adoption because there are so many kids that did not ask to be born but truly want a family to love. We did research on adoption choices and decided on domestic adoption through CPS. You would be surprised the differences between each agency. The adoption process is nothing like you see in the movies. I am also a 5 year breast cancer survivor. When I was diagnosed my kids were 3, 5 and 7 I did so much research I may have driven my Dr. a little crazy but that is ok it is my body not his.