It used to be that when an adult would meet a child for the first time, they would ask, “How old are you?” Now they ask, “What grade are you in?” and determine the age based on the grade. This doesn’t make sense. Plenty of children are held back or accelerated in their progression from grade to grade, and equating a child’s grade with their age isn’t accurate.
Furthermore, if a child says they’re in a grade that is lower than the “accepted norm” for their age, this opens them up to ridicule. A few months ago, my daughter told a relative that she’s in 4th grade. “That’s okay,” he said. “I was behind too.”
I sat down with my children’s workbooks the other day and came to an interesting realization. Not one of my children is performing in the same level for every subject. My daughter is doing 3rd grade spelling, 4th grade math, and 5th grade reading. My first son, while eight years old, is doing high school-level engineering and science projects. My five-year-old is reading at a second grade level. How on earth do you take the abilities of a child and squash them into a grade level?
We made a decision at my house. We aren’t talking about grade levels any more. When my daughter is done with her spelling book, I’ll move her up to the next highest one, and so we’ll progress through the course. The same will be done for each of my children until they have all accomplished the required courses of study. In this way, it won’t matter if my son is in a harder math book than my daughter; she won’t feel picked on because he’s farther along than she is, even though he’s younger. We’re going to concentrate on the achievements of each child and not hold them back because they aren’t in “that grade” yet.
When I told my children of this plan, they got so excited. They are prepared to work hard and to excel without the added pressure of well-meaning adults who want to classify them according to the number on the front of a book. I’ve even told my kids that if someone asks them what grade they’re in, they should say, “Ask my mom.” I’ll be more than happy to explain my new theology.
Am I worried about losing track of where my children are and what they should be doing? No, not in the slightest. I know what workbook comes after the one we’re in now, and I’ll still know what level each child is operating on. But that will be Mommy’s little secret. They don’t need to perform to a set standard that was determined for them by someone else who doesn’t even know them. I want them to concentrate on what they’re learning, not worried that they’re a little behind Betty Jo or feeling cocky that they’re way ahead of Timmy.
Tristi Pinkston is a full-time blogger in Movie and Media Reviews. Click here to find family-friendly entertainment.
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