What Should We Tell?

If you have adopted children one thing you think about is how you will explain to the kids what their life story is. Of course our kids all know they are adopted we have never kept that a secret we actually speak of it with great pride. We tell them that they were chosen by us in specific. I had actually made a story up for them talking about how we looked high and low then we looked in our hearts and found them. We have explained to them that when people have babies from the tummy they do not get to choose the children they have, but we got to choose our kids. That makes them extra special.

My question that I am thinking about today is many children that are adopted want to know why their biological mother and father are not the parents they are growing up. Based on the harsh reality that some children in foster care has or that has been adopted the story of their biological families may be not the best. There was a story that I heard about where a baby was left on the side of the road by their biological mother. The baby was placed near a fire ant hill and by the time the baby was rescued it was covered head to toe. Do you tell that child the truth? Do you only tell them that they were placed for adoption?

We have a similar problem no our kids were not left in an ant hill but our middle son was left under a car. Do we have to tell him that? Do we have to tell our oldest that his tummy mommy used to let her boyfriend’s beat on him? I really do not want to tell them the truth would I be wrong to keep this from them?

Read More About Us : Some Parts of our kids are on a need to know basis

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About Tammy Woolard

My name is Tammy and I am 40 year old mother of 3 wonderful children who came to us through domestic adoption. Although we did not have any fertility issues we chose adoption because there are so many kids that did not ask to be born but truly want a family to love. We did research on adoption choices and decided on domestic adoption through CPS. You would be surprised the differences between each agency. The adoption process is nothing like you see in the movies. I am also a 5 year breast cancer survivor. When I was diagnosed my kids were 3, 5 and 7 I did so much research I may have driven my Dr. a little crazy but that is ok it is my body not his.