Over the last few weeks, I’ve been taking an online organization course. I’ve always been the kind of person who makes to-do lists, and I like to stay organized. Now, note that I like to stay organized – I didn’t say it always happens, and the last two months have been absolutely crazy busy for me.
As I sat contemplating my to-do list and following the course’s homework assignment of thinking about my priorities, I contemplated my family. I wanted to start listing all the wonderful things I was going to do for them, from color-coordinating their closets to fluffing all their stuffed animals – and then I realized that my goal should be much more simple. I should concentrate on giving them what they need most.
And then my thoughts turned to my marriage. When life gets crazy, it’s easy to ignore your spouse. Your children will get really vocal if they feel they’re being ignored – at the very least, they’ll bellyache until you feed them. They’re good that way – they have built-in ignoring alarms. But spouses don’t always have those. A spouse will often suffer in silence, knowing that you’re busy, not wanting to add to your already taxed schedule, but just because they’re quiet, that doesn’t mean they don’t have needs too.
Last night, my husband was sitting on the couch, reading. I put down the project I was working on and went and sat down next to him. We so rarely have quiet moments together, and how could I keep working when there was the perfect opportunity to spend some time together? It wasn’t long, maybe ten minutes, but he put down his book and we just talked. And you know what – that turned out to be what we both needed most at that moment.
Let’s face it – we’re not superheroes. We can’t turn back time or zap all our work done, and we can’t solve the problems of the world. We might not be able to do every single thing we want to for our families, or for our spouses. But if we concentrate on giving them the things they need the very, very most—and those things are usually love and appreciation—it’s okay if their clothes aren’t precisely ironed or their sandwiches made just so.
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