Playing tennis can teach us something about marriage. When Mick and I partner each other at tennis and the opposition drops a short ball I tend to say ‘up, up, up’. He always found it helpful when we played competition tennis. The number of ‘ups’ was indicative of how fast he needed to move on the court.
Even though we’re playing social tennis now and enjoy it, we’re still out there to try and win. Throughout the game we encourage each one when one of us hits a good shot and encourage each other to keep going when either of us is playing badly.
Encouragement is I think a key not just one the tennis court but in all of marriage.The right words or actions from our partner can be such a boost as Courtney found.
Marriage is also about knowing the other person. When I play on the net and have to move out of my comfort zone to hit a ball, Mick knows I will always keep moving across the court rather than try and run back. Running backwards is something I find hard to do. When I play with others, of course they may not realize this because we don’t have the same understanding of each other’s games that Mick and I do.
The same is true in our marriage, in knowing what offends the other one in the world. I knew without asking Mick would say injustice. The other one was minority groups that think they have a right to tell everyone else how they ought to live. But I checked just to make sure.
He knows those things that offend me. I feel strongly about are those who harm children or those who are violent against women – both things I could never imagine Mick doing. Like him I’m also offended by injustice.
One of the ladies on the forum is struggling with a husband who continually lies an it is destroying the foundations of their marriage, so she doesn’t know what to do. I believe we need to be able to trust our marriage partner- hard to do if the person continually lies. Would you agree?
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Complex Lies and Your Marriage