So when is your marriage really over?
Many people think that the answer to this question is when the divorce is final in court. However for some people and couples that is not true.
A marriage can last for a long time after the final papers have been issued. While the marriage may be over legally, it may not be over emotionally and mentally.
Most people that have gone through a divorce will agree that while the final papers help with some closure, they do not erase the life that you once lived together and automatically let you start again with a clean slate. You must do that internally within your own mind, heart, and sou.
As long as one or both partners still have a feeling of anger or hurt toward the marriage or the divorce then it is not over completely.
Many partners hold a strong feeling of anger toward the other if they were left for another person or if their spouse had an affair. This is especially true if children were involved.
During these cases, the person may feel that he or she and the children are victims.
When a person finds themselves still in the marriage long after the divorce has taken place, he or she can look for inner peace, therapy, religion, self-help groups, and advice about forgiveness of self to forgive the enemy for closure.
It may help to look at the situation of forgiving your mate as way to gain your peace of mind back. Do not let any person take away your inner peace with yourself.
If you and your ex cannot see or talk to one another without causing grief for you, then do not do it. Find a common grounds and a middle person to do any communicating that is necessary. This may be a therapist or a lawyer.
Emotional and Physical Affairs