I still call my mother when times get rough in my world of single parenting. It’s not that she really offers me advice unless I directly beg for it, it’s more that she listens, relates, has a “been there, done that” empathetic tone and tells me I’m doing a good job–no matter how lame and battered I feel. And she dangles the carrot that, “You’re almost done!” My mother is not my only resource for parenting advice, but I don’t feel like I have to impress her and I know she loves her grandchildren so she won’t say anything against them either. She’s mastered the art of being available and nonjudgmental.
I know other parents who really can’t go to their own parents though, for whatever reasons. Like them, I also have friends, family, even coworkers who have been good sounding boards for parenting issues over the years. Some of those former coworkers have become lifelong friends and, if I remember correctly, we got to know each other by sharing advice over how to cope with parenthood and our children.
I use my fair share of books, magazines, online blogs and articles too. For times when I don’t really need to commiserate, but need to bury myself in “expert advice” –the written kind of advice does the trick. I usually find that I knew more than I thought I did and I probably didn’t need the advice after all–I just needed a little reinforcement and support. But books and articles are great for ideas and suggestions and helping me to get myself thinking outside my little world. It seems to help me just as much to read stuff I DON’T agree with, as it does stuff I do. Either way, I feel more resolved in my approach to parenting and am ready to jump back in the ring.
How about you? Where do you go for parenting advice? Do you have trusted friends or family or do you rely on professionals and advice of the written variety?
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