Where to from Here?

Too often these days the wedding day is rather like the moon shot or moon walk. At least that’s what my husband observed the other day. What did his mean? Let me explain.

He’d been reading an article in Time magazine about Neil Armstrong, Buzz Aldrin and others who went to the moon. First there was all the waiting and preparation that went on for so long beforehand, followed by the hype during the moon landing. Then it’s over, the astronauts come home and suddenly realize, once you’ve been to the moon and walked on the moon, what else is there left to do? In the words of Buzz Aldrin, ‘What does a man do for an encore?’

Sadly that’s the way some feel about marriage. They focus so much on the wedding day and getting all the details right. They wait and plan and concentrate so much on making it an unforgettable wedding, that it becomes the focus. Then the couple is surrounded by all the hype of the wedding day. It’s built up out of all proportion.

Then suddenly it is all over and there can be a feeling of let down. Now what? Where do we go from here? What excitement can compare with this?

It’s like the feeling that kids sometimes get after Christmas. They wait and there’s all the build up and expectations and then all you’re left with is the wrapping paper the mess and the gifts all opened. There can be a feeling of let down.

To Mick’s mind and mine that is what happens with weddings, because people have got their priorities wrong. It’s not all about making it the most unforgettable wedding.

If each of us put as much care and planning into our marriages and keeping them on track and making them the best they can be instead of trying to create a perfect wedding day, then maybe marriage would be in a better state than it is. If we spent less time and money on the actual wedding day and more time and effort in the details of daily married life and loving our spouse, marriages would fare better. If we spent more time in preparing ourselves for marriage perhaps through marriage preparation classes, rather than just focusing on the wedding day, marriages would have a better chance of success. Would you agree?

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