A friend posted an article on her facebook page, that supports my own personal views on parenting babies. I’ve never been a “cry it out” kind of Mom. I just couldn’t do it. I never felt it was the right way to go with my children. Although, I have friends who swear by the Baby Wise method, it just wasn’t for me.
With my first child, every little whimper she made I ran to her side. I held her constantly, and nursed her around the clock as an infant. She co-slept with us for the first 4 months of her life. Was I spoiling her? I don’t think so. I think I was simply responding to her needs. I looked at her and saw a tiny, helpless being incapable of trying to control or manipulate me with her cries. She needed one thing: Love. I continued those same parenting tactics with my second. He was a little more high-maintenance, or maybe I was just a little more tired the second time around, and I responded a little later than I would have liked to his cries, but I still never let him cry himself to sleep as an infant.
In the article, Why Spoiled Babies Grow Up to Be Smarter, Kinder Kids by Maia Szalavitz, she talks about another group of research studies out of Notre Dame that suggest that the more affection, touch, and quick response that a baby gets in infancy, the kinder and more empathetic human being they will become. This does not go to say that anyone with a horrible childhood will not be a kind person, but that simply giving your child more, rather than less attention, can only benefit them in the long run.
This is not the first research that has suggested this. Attachment parenting is practiced by millions of parents all over the world, whether they realize it or not. It should be our natural instinct as parents to respond to the cries of our children. However, other parenting tactics are also popular. My view is this: You can never really “spoil” an infant. Their only desire is to be loved. And when you receive love, it only seems natural that you will grow up and want to love others in return.
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