Jon and I started dating in college, and we were far from the only ones in our social circles to do so. Some of the others would make fun of us, giving us couples’ names, like the media does for dating celebrities (our name was Jangela). It never really bothered me, except for one potential interpretation: was there some truth in the fact that I didn’t do much without Jon? Looking back, I think that I had enough friends and enough things going on in my college life that were separate from my boyfriend. But I could see how it … Continue reading →

I had always slept in a twin-sized bed, and I liked my blankets just so and my pillow just so. I liked to toss and turn before I went to sleep. I was not used to sharing a bed with anyone. Then I met my husband. He too liked to sleep in a certain way, and he was not used to sharing a bed with anyone. Our wedding day was beautiful. The weather was gorgeous, the ceremony was touching, we were surrounded by friends and family. Then cold, hard reality set in. We are both blanket hogs. We spent the … Continue reading →

I’m always amused when I hear young couples at the grocery store. I can tell which ones are shopping for the first time. They are always very careful to clear their choices with their spouse, to the point of self-denial. “Honey, do you like carrots? You don’t? Okay, I’ll put this back.” When you get married, you are taking two lives and melding them into one, and this is true on so many levels, right down to the grocery shopping. Suddenly you’re trying to decide what to eat—a decision that once was so simple, now made complex. How do two … Continue reading →

If you are married then you must be committed to your spouse, right? actually, this is not necessarily the case. Many couples find themselves having difficulty truly committing, even after the marriage ceremony. Taking two lives and blending them together without losing individuality can be difficult. Perhaps this is why many marriages fail within the first two years. Making a commitment to someone means closing the door on other competing possibilities. In other words, no more fishing in the sea for another partner. While this can be a joy, many people also find it very scary. In our society, we … Continue reading →

If you haven’t discussed the following topics before you got married then you should do so soon. You want to make sure that there are certain things you both understand, if you want to have a long and happy marriage. Sex Most couples, even close couples, don’t like talking about sex. But sex can get you in to all sorts of trouble. You should confront and discuss different aspects of sex, such as how much and how often. You should also establish a way to gently communicate when one of you just isn’t up for sex, and how each of … Continue reading →

It is glad to see Heather back writing in Marriage! In one of her articles about marriage breakers, Heather made a statement that I felt I needed to comment on. She referred back to a previous article that she had written and about a heated discussion she and her husband had about expectations and chores. Many times women, as new wives, can get themselves into more trouble in the beginning than they realize. When you first get married it can be exciting and feel a lot like you are “playing house”. You cannot wait to decorate and clean and cook … Continue reading →

In the past couple of articles, I have addressed newly wedded wives and name changes. I never knew so many options existed. In my research I found a very interesting piece of information about name changes across the world. I just had to share with you! America (English speaking countries) It is tradition in English speaking countries for the woman to take on the man’s name. There are several variations of how the woman does this. She may use her maiden name as a middle name or use her last name along with his and a hyphen. As a child, … Continue reading →

Changing your name after marriage can be a time consuming process if you have a lot of cards or legal documents. However, it can also be just as simple of a process. You should not feel guilty if you decide to change your name. You should also not make your children feel like they should keep their maiden name. With the proper paperwork, most states allow you to easily change your name even if you have not gotten married. In most situations, changing your name requires a legal document such as a certified copy of your marriage license or divorce … Continue reading →