One day, my husband attended a seminar and came home with two huge bags in his hands. He had been very impressed with what the instructor had to say, and purchased the learning materials he would need to embark on this course of study. He had indebted us for over $900.00, and hadn’t said one word to me beforehand. You can imagine, I was not the most amused person on the planet.
In my husband’s defense, he studied the materials carefully and went on to excel in his studies. The time he invested in those studies, and the money we paid, was more than worth it as he was then able to use that knowledge to bring income to our family. I was very gratified to see that the investment had paid off, although the experience did teach us one firm rule, one every couple should make when it comes to money: no large expenditures without discussing it first.
This is important for the following reasons:
1. Finances are a leading cause of divorce. Miscommunication about money, feeling that one spouse is doing all the spending and the other is doing all the earning, feeling resentment over lack of funds—these factors lead to mistrust in a marriage. By openly discussing your finances and what you plan to do with your money, you are building trust.
2. It helps keep the checkbook balanced. If you and your spouse never talk about money, and you’re off buying one large-ticket item and he’s off buying something else, you can go over budget and even cause serious problems as you spend money you thought you had, but in reality, don’t.
3. It will help you plan for your future. If you discuss your expenditures with each other, and you keep your savings in mind as you budget, you can keep your goals firmly in mind and be able to tuck away more than you would if you didn’t have open communication.
Money is hard enough without bringing relationship difficulties into the mix, and marriage is hard enough without throwing money troubles into the pot. Sit down and discuss things with your spouse, and it will prevent a great many conflicts down the road.
Related Blogs:
Marriage and Money: Resenting Your Spouse
How to Prevent Money Matters from Hurting Your Marriage
Should You Keep Your Money Separate or Together in a Marriage?