Well I just returned from a three day weekend trip to North Carolina. I attended a Christian writer’s conference and for the first time in my life, flew to another state without my husband and children.
I wasn’t sure what to expect, as far as my children being without me for three days. Since they are pretty self-sufficient and independent, I didn’t anticipate it being a big deal. The few days leading up to my trip, my oldest two did express that they would miss me. It was my youngest son, my 12-year-old that seemed more than happy that I was going.
The reason is because almost the entire week leading up to my time away, was filled with conflict. We were butting heads all week and I was beginning to feel like I needed the break from him. I was ready for my husband to deal with him on his own.
At one point when I tried to make peace with my son, the day before I left, he continued to be stubborn and didn’t want to talk to me. So I was then feeling a mixture of relief on getting a break but hurt that he wasn’t willing to end things before I left.
Of all my children, I have to say that it is my youngest that I have the most conflict with. I have heard it said that this usually happens with the child who is most like you. Yes, I would have to agree.
So this past Friday I had to be at the airport by 4:20 a.m. My husband was going to take me and the night before I said my goodbyes to my children, as I headed off to bed at 7 p.m., in hopes of getting some decent sleep.
Imagine my surprise when I woke up at 3:30 a.m. to get ready and found that my daughter and youngest son; yes, the one I had been struggling with all week, had surprised me by staying up all night so they could come with to the airport.
At the airport I said my goodbyes to my children. I had told all three of them earlier that they could text me anytime during the weekend. In fact, I encouraged them to. Well as it turned out I didn’t hear at all from my oldest two.
But Sunday morning I woke up and turned on my phone to see two text messages from my youngest son. He asked when I was coming home because he missed me. I was teary-eyed as I realized that despite our sometimes difficult moments, he still has love for me. Now of course I don’t doubt that my son loves me but when you are constantly at odds with a child, it can sometimes leave you wondering.
When the conference ended early afternoon Sunday, I was faced with a long wait since my flight wasn’t scheduled to leave until evening. I was put on standby for an earlier flight, which I made. But then it meant arriving at O’Hare airport a few hours earlier than originally planned.
I was supposed to take another flight to my hometown in Milwaukee, Wisconsin but since I got to O’Hare so early, I would have had to wait a few hours. Instead, my husband decided to drive to Chicago to pick me up (about an hour and a half ride).
I was pleasantly surprised to see my youngest son had come along. What made it all the more touching to me was that he had been sick to his stomach since early morning. He couldn’t even sit up; he laid down the entire drive but had insisted on coming with to pick me up.
He was so sick all he could do was reach out his hand from the backseat and grab mine. He just wanted to hold it for a few seconds. It was very touching to me.
It was also a reminder that I can’t let conflict with any of my children deceive me into thinking we don’t have a good relationship. Conflict comes with most relationships. It’s just that it may be more frequent in certain ones.
I am so thankful that I was able to see this side of our relationship. I will hold onto this memory so that the next time we butt heads, I can remember how strong our relationship really is.
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Photo Above: My Youngest Son Jacob