The morning came particularly quickly on my son’s first day of daycare. Despite my wife’s best efforts to have everything neatly organized in bags near the door the morning still felt rushed, uncomfortable, and different. I had a little talk with my son. As a father I felt it was my duty to tell him that today was going to be different. I told him that we weren’t abandoning him and that his mom was going to check in on him at lunchtime and pick him up early. I told him that he would be with other babies and some nice adults. I told him about the mirrors and the toys and the cribs and the regularly scheduled feedings (as well as the note to feed him whenever he wants it… an important thing for him) but none of this took my worry away.
My son looked into my eyes the entire time. He didn’t blink. He could sense, somehow, that I was telling him something important. Today would be different. He understood that much at least. His little face just smiled once I was done talking. “That must have been something really important! Thanks, Dad!” His smile made me feel better.
When we got to the daycare he smiled at the employees. My wife nursed him in a separate room and I watched as the other babies were dropped off. Some were content with seeing the mobile hanging above them and others weren’t fooled by the moving shapes and colors above them: they cried. They knew what was happening and they didn’t like it. What, I ask, does a Dad hope for in an instance like this? Do I hope that my son is gladly distracted by other objects in the room and doesn’t notice or know that his parents are leaving? Do I hope that he figures out what is going on and starts crying? I don’t like either of these options.
Eventually my wife returns with our son. He looks content with the world after eating and we take him to his small area on the floor. I set him down on his tummy and lie down for a moment with him. There are mirrors on all sides: we don’t have this at home. He’s immediately fascinated. He sees me and smiles. He sees himself and smiles. He gets kisses from his parents and then we’re off. He doesn’t cry. Next I’ll talk about Daycare Day 1: Evening