Do you need an article on the things you shouldn’t say or call your spouse? After all, when it comes to looking at your wife or your husband and declaring in all seriousness – wow, you’re fat! It’s a running joke in our family that my husband is terrible at being supportive (he’s not, but he likes to joke that he is.) Part of the way he motivates is to tweak you – or me in this case.
For example, when I got curious about quilting and interested in doing it, my husband saw it as a sinkhole for money – especially if I didn’t do anything more with the project than buy fabric and more. I was using a friend’s sewing machine and when I mentioned it might be easier for me to finish the quilt I was working on with my own sewing machine, he quirked his lips and stated categorically: “if you can finish that quilt, we’ll talk, but since I don’t see you finishing it, I don’t want to waste money on a new sewing machine.”
You Can’t Do It
He told me I couldn’t do it, so of course, being the stubborn person that I am – I did do it. I love quilting now and it’s a fulltime hobby and I like to make quilts for my friends and for others. By the same token, when it came to working out and getting in shape, he didn’t want to be a partner in that because he was worried about his habit of tweaking.
You see, a few years ago, I was getting ready to go out somewhere and I was trying on a dress I hadn’t worn in a while. I wasn’t sure that it looked all right and I came out of the closet to show him the dress. He looked at me a long moment and then said in a very matter of fact voice when I asked what he thought – “Chunky Monkey!”
To say I was appalled would be to put it mildly – however the expression on his face when he realized what he said – that was hilarious. He was mortified, embarrassed and horrified all at once. I have no idea what emotion was the strongest at that point. He stammered out an apology and I started laughing. To this day, you can say the words chunky monkey and we both laugh about it. He claims that I never looked that bad in the dress, but I never did wear the dress again!
No Brainers
Be careful of what you say, but look for the humor in it as much as you can. It’s an obvious thing to say don’t call your wife fat – but then I think it would be obvious not to respond to your wife’s inquiry of how she looks in an outfit with chunky monkey too.
What no brainers have you oopsed on before?
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