Two of my favorite people in the world welcomed twins into their family back in July. They are amazing parents — at least in my humble opinion. It certainly doesn’t seem easy to have twins, but they make it look good.
This month, they both got sick. Some sort of upper respiratory crud — not the flu, hopefully, because everybody had their flu shots — that lingered on and on, sapping energy on top of making them feel miserable.
I was talking to mom as they were starting to get better… and she commented that she practically hadn’t seen dad in weeks. When she was baby wrangling, he was resting and trying to get better. When he was baby wrangling, she was resting and trying to get better. It was like they were living on totally separate schedules, passing in the hallway as one or the other stumbled to bed!
Growing up, I can’t actually remember an occasion when BOTH my parents were sick… though it always seemed bad when Mom was sick because Dad could barely cook. (Scrambled eggs with chopped up hot dogs was his idea of a gourmet meal.) And Dad definitely lacked the sympathy factor when compared to Mom’s caretaking!
Still, it happens. If all the caretakers in the family are sick, what can you do? Here are some ideas.
* Take turns, like my friends did. You might not get as much rest as you’d like, but you’ll get more than you would if you were flying solo. Figure out a schedule that works and is fair to all parties… but also be flexible if things need to change.
* Communicate clearly. If you need help, ask for help. If the schedule isn’t working for you, say so… just be prepared to hammer out a new one. Nobody is a mind reader — especially when they’re sick. So if you need or want something, you have to say so.
* Call in support staff. Family and friends may be willing to enter the sick house in order to help. Even if they aren’t able to do childcare, they could prepare meals, go to the food store, or do some cleaning! (Just make sure they don’t catch whatever you have — offer face masks and plenty of hand sanitizer.)
* Consider sleeping separately… especially if one person is on the mend and the other is still miserable. For one thing, you won’t be disturbed by the other person’s moving, sneezing, coughing, etc. For another thing, you can keep your germs to yourself (and vice versa!).
* Recognize your limits. Don’t push yourself too hard to be SuperParent when you’re sick. Some things really can wait until you’re better!
* Don’t milk it. Yes, you’ve been sick. But once you’re starting to feel better, be grateful and start getting back to your usual routine!