My son started daycare this week. I spent a lot of time beforehand researching different daycare centers, looking into family and friends that did daycare, etc. After stressing about it for most of the summer I finally found one that I felt pretty good about. We set up a time to go meet with her about two weeks before I was supposed to start back to school. We went to her house and met a few of the other kids. Logan warmed up fairly quickly and I started to feel like everything was going to be ok.
Then my old anxieties returned. The whole week before classes I cried every single day. What if the kids were mean to him? What if he absolutely hated it there? What if she lost track of him? What if he feels like I’ve abandoned him? How was I possibly going to leave him when I was feeling this way? A part of me wanted to just drop out of school and stay home with him forever.
The first day came. We arrived at the house once again. To my surprise he took her hand and went out to play with the other kids. I still hated leaving him, but I felt good knowing that he was in good hands and there were lots of new friends for him to make.
Even though it took me a whole summer to find the right woman to care for my child while I was away I am so thankful that I spent the time finding the right fit for us. It gives me a chance to finish my schooling so that I can better support him and it gives him the opportunity to meet and play with other kids his age. As hard as it is leaving him for those couple of hours every week I know that we are both growing from it and are learning to better appreciate the time we do have together.