In the hectic months leading up to a big move, most couples spend so much time considering the outward or tangible aspects of their relocation that they don’t take care to protect their relationship. They pack possessions and heirlooms, fret over the commute, or wonder what their new neighbors will
be like. They neglect to consider the toll that the potentially disruptive step of relocating can take on a marriage relationship. Remember – you are moving the center of your life from one place to another! It is a good idea to talk to your spouse and ensure that both of you are ready to accept the changes that inevitably come with relocation.
The first thing you should discuss with your spouse is whether he or she has emotionally prepared him or herself for the move. You’ve both been so busy with making the arrangements that you may have neglected your emotional needs. Talk to each other about the changes you anticipate and how you plan to deal with any difficulties that may arise. Consider how you will keep in touch with the friends and family you leave behind. Be open with one another about any apprehension you may feel about the move and your new life. Remind one another of the love you share, and promise to support each other through the moving process. If you discuss these things before the fact, the process will be much easier for both of you.
Moving can be tougher than expected even after your belongings have been transferred. The first few weeks or even months in a new home can be extremely disorienting as you and your family members begin to readjust. Remember to be patient with one another. The nature, length, and severity of the readjustment phase is different for everyone. You may be ready to embark on your new adventure immediately, while your spouse is more reluctant. Be compassionate, and don’t try to push him or her into a premature or false sense of security. Work together to understand, enjoy, and adapt to your new environment, but resist the urge to force anything.
Make an adventure out of exploring your new environment. Get a feel for the culture of your new city or neighborhood by taking yourselves on a walking tour of its popular destinations. Visit downtown hot spots, city landmarks, and religious centers with your spouse. Exploring your new surroundings and interacting with the people who share them will give you and your spouse a sense of belonging. As you integrate yourselves and make new friends, you will feel more and more at home.
Relocation can be stressful. If you and your spouse prepare yourselves, however, you will be more open to seeing your new life as a wonderful adventure and opportunity. Don’t be afraid to explore new possibilities and enjoy change. Moving to a new location can be frightening but it is also an excellent motivation towards positive changes and advancements that were not possible in your old home. The stress of moving can be a blessing in disguise.