Single parenting can come about in a number of ways. Some of us were thrust into it unwillingly as a result of a divorce, others are faced with a difficult decision; single parent or place. I have been on both ends of the single parenting spectrum. I was just out of high school and faced with the most difficult decision of my life. My boyfriend and I had just broken up less than 24 hours before I found myself pregnant. A good friend of mine found herself in a similar situation not long after I did. One of us chose one path, the other chose another one. We both made the decision that was right for us at the time.
When I found out I was pregnant I was bombarded with everyone else’s opinions about what I should do. Many pointed me towards adoption, some pointed me toward keeping him, and there were even a few that thought I should get an abortion. Abortion was never an option in my mind, but the other two options weighed heavily on my mind. I knew that adoption was a beautiful thing and in many ways it seemed like the logical choice in my situation. I was 18, unmarried, and just barely into my first semester of college. On the other hand I was feeling very much like I should keep him. I was torn trying to make this decision on my own. I decided to make an appointment to talk to LDS Family Services just to talk things through. I wanted to make sure I had really researched all of my options. My social worker’s name was Melissa. At first I was worried they were going to pressure me into adoption, but when I walked into the room I immediately felt at peace. She told me about how beautiful adoption was that of course she was a strong advocate for it, but it certainly wasn’t right for everyone. I still hadn’t made a decision one way or the other, but I continued to make appointments every few weeks as I weighed my options.
About half way through my pregnancy I felt an overwhelming feeling that I was supposed to keep my baby. I knew without a doubt that he was meant to be with me and that that was the path I needed to take. Many people disagreed with my decision to single parent. They thought I was too young, that I was giving up too much, and that I would never be able to give him the things that he needed. Did I sacrifice a lot to single parent my son? Yes. What parent doesn’t make sacrifices for their children, single or not? My baby’s father and I did end up getting married several months later, in an attempt to make things right. Things ended in disaster, but we tried.
The decision to single parent was one of the most difficult I have ever made. It was one that I didn’t take lightly, but I know without a doubt in my mind that it was the right decision for me in my situation. Though it may not have made sense to anyone else, I knew in my heart that it was right.