Tag Archives: family breakdown

TV’s in Children’s Bedrooms (2)

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I observed firsthand the problems of having TV’s in children’s bedrooms back when my daughter was in elementary school. One of the girls in her Year 4 class had one in her bedroom and she was the envy of her peers. Naturally this girl boasted about her new-found televisual independence and I’m sure there were cries of “I want one, too!” in more than our household. When I found out this girl’s older sister in Year 8 also had her own TV, as well as her younger brother in Year 3, it became almost like a scientific experiment for me. … Continue reading →

A Sane Christmas with your Insane Family

Well, perhaps your family isn’t clinically insane, but there are lots of families where dysfunction is as much a part of the family as the heirloom furniture. In our last article, we looked at how the younger sister of a two-daughter family decided her life was too short to go on being abused by her older sister. So Miriam made the decision to formally end her relationship with Rachel, and her Christmases and indeed her life, has been the better for it. Not all of us want or need to be as radical as Miriam in cutting out her sibling … Continue reading →

Looking after your Mental Health over Christmas

The holiday period can be a stressful time as families get together and old grievances move from festering mode into an outright screaming match. So how can you make this Christmas a better one in terms of your mental health? The key is to Be Prepared! If you have a history of unhappy Christmases with your family, the first option to consider is whether to see your birth family at all. Where considerable damage has been wreaked by a parent on a child, or by one sibling on another, and there is no hope of change, it can be preferable … Continue reading →

Families and Christmas: An Explosive Combination

Christmas is the season of good cheer, right? Well, for the most part it is. But for some people the holiday season is a time of verbal, physical and emotional abuse as families meet and “gifts” are exchanged. Often when we meet up with our parents and siblings at this time of year, there is more that the Christmas spirit bubbling away within us. In fact, the holiday season is a busy time for hospital staff and mental health workers alike. There is something about the expectations surrounding Christmas that elicits powerful emotions in us when those expectations are not … Continue reading →

Why Is It So Hard To Say “I’m Sorry?”

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Most people find it pretty hard to apologize. Why is this? We do something wrong, we acknowledge to ourselves that we have done something wrong, and yet we may still find it hard to get those two little words out from between our pursed lips. So, why is it so hard to apologize? Everyone makes mistakes. To deny that is to be out of touch with reality. So why are we so hard on ourselves when the time comes to say “I’m sorry”? One of the common mistakes that people often make when it comes to making an apology is … Continue reading →

When An Apology Is Not An Apology (1)

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We’ve probably all experienced this: the apology that somehow doesn’t satisfy. The apology that leaves us feeling vaguely uncomfortable or even downright angry. Yet, haven’t we just received an apology? Or maybe we haven’t! An apology is supposed to be a statement of genuine remorse that acknowledges that one person has done something to offend or upset another and wants to reassure the person that they have made a mistake and will try their best not to repeat the act. For an apology to qualify as an apology, there needs to be an effective understanding of what the offended person … Continue reading →