Coping with Loss

It is difficult for anyone when they lose someone they love. It can be even more difficult to watch those that you love struggle with their loss when they do not have the knowledge of the Gospel to help them through their loss. At times, I don’t give much thought to the fact that merely knowing what happens after we die is a huge comfort to me. Since I was raised in the church, it has always been a part of my understanding of God, His Plan, and What happens after this life. But, for many, they do not have … Continue reading

Dealing With Death

The way death affects marriage partners varies. The death of a child can have serious consequences on a marriage. This could be because men and women tend to try to handle such a situation in various ways, and sometimes they don’t know enough about how the other is feeling and why they react as they do. The death of a parent can also affect a men and woman in different ways and is something most of us will experience at some point. Mick and I have gone through this twice since we have been married, first with the death of … Continue reading

Fairy Tale – a True Story (1997)

The world is at war and the people are unsettled. Francis’s family has been hit particularly hard with the death of their son, and her parents are walking shells of their former selves, not seeming to recognize that she’s in pain, too. When her cousin Elsie comes to stay, they take comfort in the craziness of the world around them by talking about fairies. They come in from the garden with wild stories of how they saw the fairies and spoke to them, but Francis’s parents don’t want to listen. Until one day, that is, when the girls steal the … Continue reading

What is Adoption Loss?

We all know of miscarriage, or pregnancy loss. “Adoption loss” is the bereavement felt when an expected adoption does not occur. Although less than one-tenth of a percent of finalized adoptions are contested each year, parents are often heavily invested emotionally before finalization or before placement. Often they have been meeting with birthparents for several months. They may have seen the baby via ultrasound, chosen a name for the baby, shared the news with their families, prepared the baby’s room, and bought clothing specific to the gender of the expected child. Some birth parents even invite the adoptive parents to … Continue reading

How to Help Those Grieving

Each of us will encounter loss at some point in our lives. So will other family members and friends, so how can we help those who are grieving. 1. Remember what it felt like to be in that position but don’t expect the other person to react exactly the same way you did in grief. 2. Don’t avoid the grieving person because you don’t know what to say or you’re frightened of getting upset and upsetting them more. When I was younger I admit to doing that at a funeral. I kept my distance from the woman grieving her daughter’s … Continue reading

Dealing With Grief

Recently I overheard two women in the supermarket car park talking about the death of someone they knew. One said, ‘It happened so suddenly and that’s always harder to cope with.’ ‘Such a shock to the family. No one was prepared,’ the other woman agreed. Is it harder to cope with? I’d dispute that. Are we ever prepared for death? I thought about my own experience with the death of my parents. Yes, Dad’s death left us in shock. It also left me feeling guilty. I was the only home with him when it happened and I used to think … Continue reading

Dealing With The Death Of Parents

Beth’s blog about parents and death prompted me to write about my experience. My father died when I was 16. It was sudden and left Mom and me reeling with shock. I didn’t have brothers and sisters to turn to but Mom and I had each other. My mother died when I was in my 30s. Hers was a battle with cancer that went on over a few years. Like Courtney, I pretty well put my life on hold. I dropped out of bible study, church and everything else I’d been involved in,but continued to read my Bible and pray … Continue reading

Growing from Sadness, Sorrow and Depression

Before I continue with this blog, I want to state I am not writing about clinical and diagnosed depression (or any mental health concern where you really need to seek professional help), I am talking about those times that all of us go through where we experience sadness, sorrow, grief and depression. Far from being the end of the world, these times can be very creative, healing, and growing times for us. Many of us come out on the other side of sadness and grief feeling stronger and more “ourselves.” We can look at these inevitable times as an opportunity … Continue reading

Dealing With Doubt

Have you ever wondered about Thomas? Wondered why Thomas wasn’t with the disciples when Jesus first appeared to them? Was his grief so deep that he couldn’t cope with being with the other disciples but needed to be alone to deal with it? That’s the way some people deal with grief. Then when they’ve worked through it, they can come back and relate to others again. Or was Thomas hiding for fear of the consequences for the disciples? After all, Jesus had been killed. Would the Pharisees and those who were against Jesus come after his disciples next? Maybe it … Continue reading

What to do About Kids and Funerals?

One of the questions that come up again and again from parents is what to do about kids and funerals? Do we take them or get a sitter? What age is appropriate for funerals and does it matter how close the child was to the deceased? This can be a sticky and stressful subject for many parents and a tough situation to negotiate… Some parents think that babies are perfectly fine to take to funerals because they won’t be running around and they are too young to really understand what is going on. But, what if they get fussy, hungry, … Continue reading