Tag Archives: resentment

Disagreements Aren’t Always Bad for Your Marriage

Disagreements aren’t always bad. In fact they can be good for your marriage. Better to have it out in the open that festering inside and the other person not knowing what is wrong. I’m sure we’ve all heard the, ‘What’s wrong?’ ‘Nothing,’ the other person replies, though obviously there is. Then eventually the other person admits what the problem is. The alternative is that they dwell on it so much that sooner or later everything little thing the other person does starts to aggravate until eventually the whole thing blows up and turns into a major argument that is not … Continue reading →

Dealing with Jealousy – part 1

Yesterday we looked at examples of jealousy in the Bible and the destructive situations jealousy can cause. We only have to look around us on any given day to see jealousy at work in our world, between siblings and family members, work colleagues, neighbors, film and TV stars, sportspeople, the list goes on. We might even struggle with jealousy in our lives. Where does jealousy stem from? It often stems from our own insecurities and lack of self confidence or fear. What is jealousy? According to Webster, the word jealous means “resentful and envious, as of someone’s success, achievements, advantages…” … Continue reading →

What is Buried Beneath the Resentment?

Resentment can be a seething, nagging emotion. It is not that all single parents have to wrestle with resentment (nor is it the solitary domain of the single parent) but it can get in the way of our being able to be fully present for our children, our families and our lives. The thing about resentment is that it is usually masking something else—it is a defensive emotion that keeps us from facing what is really going on. Figuring out what is buried beneath resentment can help us to heal and move on. Resentment can be a cover-up for things … Continue reading →

Taking Out the Trash

My children don’t seem to understand the difference between garbage and treasure. They hang on to every scrap of paper, yogurt container, soda bottle, tin foil bit, and inch of string. Every time I help them clean their rooms, we have deep discussions over what constitutes garbage and what really is worth keeping. I always throw out at least two garbage sacks of treasures, mostly for sanitary reasons but also for sanity reasons, and they are in tears because of it. I can’t wait until they are finally old enough to get what I mean when I say, “that’s garbage” … Continue reading →

Even When They Ask for Help, Expect a Little Resentment

I wrote the other day about how, as children get older, it helps if parents ask before offering up suggestions and opinions. In reality, I thought it would be fair to mention that even when they solicit our opinions and ask for our help, they may not be particularly happy about it! I find that with my teens the opposite is often quite true–if they have to ask for my help, they are rather irritated about it and they are just as likely to exhibit resentment as they are appreciation. This brings me back to my number one golden rule … Continue reading →

Dealing With a Child’s Resentment

Resentment can be a rather toxic emotion—both for the person stuck in a swirl of resentment and for the person on the other side of it. When our child is harboring resentment about something that might have happened or is feeling resentful toward us—it can be hard to take, but there are ways of coping and helping our child through a tough emotional time. What might make a child feel resentful? Well, if a child feels slighted or as if he or she hasn’t gotten a fair share of something, or he might be upset over something that has happened … Continue reading →

Hostility and Resentment Have No Place in Business

I have written before about how I do think that there is room for emotions and practicality in our small businesses. After all, we are human beings and finding a balance between our hearts and our heads can make us very effective leaders and give us a vision that guides us as we build our businesses. BUT, I do think there are some emotions that really do not help our businesses and need to be dealt with and left out of our operations if we are to be successful. Hostility and resentment are two such emotions. I live in a … Continue reading →

When Grandparents Play Favorites—Part Two

I wrote earlier today about how parents and families can start to cope when a grandparent or grandparents are playing obvious favorites among grandchildren, but I also wanted to talk about things that parents can and must do for their child or children when family dynamics go awry. Even if you’ve tried addressing the problem directly and talking with grandma or grandpa, you will still need to help a child to understand and process family favoritism issues—whether he or she is the chosen favorite or not. You may think that a child who is favored and chosen will get off … Continue reading →

Don’t Seethe in Silence

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Family life, married life – none of it is perfect and most couples that are married know this. There is the promise of married life when we’re young – an image of the perfect happily ever after. Too often when a young couple, not prepared for the rigors of married life, discover that it’s not a happily ever after unless they put in a lot of effort. Understanding this and accepting it is called being mindful in your acceptance. Your married life isn’t going to be perfect. You and your spouse will argue. Your kids will yell at you. You’ll … Continue reading →