Tag Archives: vows

Family Matters: Marriage Thicker Than Blood?

How devoted are you to your partner really? Devoted enough that if, for whatever reason, you had to choose between your husband/wife and your own family you’d choose your spouse? “Why on earth would I have to choose between the two, Courtney?” you may be wondering. “Surely nothing could be that bad it couldn’t be worked out.” Sadly, sometimes things are that bad. Sometimes things just can’t be worked out. For instance, sometimes a parent opposes a match so fiercely they throw down an ultimatum: marry him/her and I’ll never speak to you again. When my mom was living with … Continue reading →

You and Your Ring: ‘Til Death Do You Part?

I’ve been writing a lot about rings lately and it got me to thinking about something some women do: trade up for bigger diamonds. Some do it only a couple of years into marriage, some do it for bigger anniversaries such as 10th or 20th. When Wayne and I went to pick out my ring he knew how much he was willing to spend. He wasn’t buying into the spend-three-months-salary concept for choosing a diamond, much to the saleslady’s chagrin. She kept pushing him to reveal how much he earned, but he wouldn’t tell her. I guess she figured he … Continue reading →

Writing Your Own Vows

Ever thought about writing your own wedding vows? Sounds like a real tough prospect. Can you possibly sound as poetic as one of those television programs or even the most traditional of vows: ‘for richer or for poorer, in sickness and health?’ Of course you can. The idea behind writing your own vows is not about sounding better than someone else, but about sounding more genuine and honest. It’s also about knowing ahead of time what to expect, because there’s nothing more unnerving than standing in front of the minister, priest or justice of the peace and having them recite … Continue reading →

Til Death Do Us Part … That’s Easy

When you get married in a traditional ceremony, one of the vows they ask you to make is to love and cherish each other and keeping yourself only unto each other ’til death do you part. The ‘til death do you part’ portion of the vows is actually easy. Before you scoff, think about it – do you know a couple who are married who seem to have very little in common, very little to say to each other and do very little together – yet, they remain married and in that relationship because they committed to ‘til death do … Continue reading →

Oaths and the Bible

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Probably most of us have heard the controversy around Keith Ellison, the first Muslim to be elected to serve in the United States Congress, who had announced he would not be taking his ceremonial oath of office on the Bible as traditionally done—-even by non-Christians and Jews. He had instead expressed his wish to take his oath on the Koran. This has become a controversial issue because according to the belief of many Muslims and Islamic scholar Imam Ghazali, to lie is basically justified as long as it is for Allah or the for the sake of the religion (Ahmad … Continue reading →

Is Divorce What’s Wrong with Marriage?

Some may read the title and think, “Well, duh!” Divorce, or more accurately, the ease with which people can now be granted a divorce may very well be one of the main reasons marriages fail. You might wonder if I got it backwards. Marriages –particularly bad ones- lead to divorce, but divorce doesn’t lead to a bad marriage, right? It depends. Easy or “no-fault” divorce may in fact lead people to look at marriage with the attitude of, “If I don’t like it, I can always get out of it.” That’s not the way marriage was intended to be undertaken, … Continue reading →

Vows and Divorce

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This is thankfully an area I’m no expert in. Divorce can be such a sensitive topic so I want to approach it with care. Our vows to our spouse probably included some of the following: To love and to cherish, for richer and for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do you part. According to Dan Hurley of The New York Times, divorce rates aren’t completely accurate and actually seem to be on a decline which is good news. Jesus clarifies divorce for us in Matthew 5:31-32, “Furthermore it has been said, ‘Whoever divorces his wife, let him … Continue reading →

Marriage and Divorce

Hearing someone promise to love you until the end of his or her life is pretty powerful stuff. In fact, I find all the statements in popular wedding vows to be quite powerful and significant. That’s why I don’t understand how some people can take such vows so lightly, although it apparently happens daily in view of current divorce rates. I understand that some people don’t give much if any thought to swearing vows before God, but what about swearing before their mate, their family members, their friends? Don’t promises mean anything any more? I guess I’m feeling especially sensitive … Continue reading →

Living Together: Test Drive for Marriage?

Many people think that living together is a good trial version of marriage. Living together may seem like a good idea and a way to get to know someone better before taking the leap. The chance to learn about each other’s quirks and faults and knowing more of what to expect, seems like a good test before making the commitment of marriage. That’s really the whole point. Living together is not at all the same kind of commitment as marriage. You swear no vows before God, witnesses, and each other, and you make no legal contract. Either person can still … Continue reading →

What’s Your Love Language?

The first couple of years of marriage were somewhat confusing for my husband and I. I would plan elaborate meals to show my husband that I loved him, while he would have preferred to go out and rake leaves together. Sometimes I longed for him to be more romantic. Meanwhile he was in the kitchen washing dishes, thinking of himself as the king of romance. What was our problem? The problem was that we didn’t know each other’s love language. After our first daughter was born, we took a child training class and it talked about the importance of the … Continue reading →