Do you know about the seven Ds? The seven Ds are ways you show your spouse what you think of him or her. I admit I adapted this idea from a writers’ newsletter, which talked about how to develop and reveal a character. But think about it and see if your don’t agree that these seven Ds can apply in a marriage and in the way you respond to your spouse.
Description
The first way is description and the point was made that the best way to describe character is to show them doing something. As you look at your marriage, what things to you do to show your spouse how much they mean to you?
Declaration
How often do you tell your spouse how great they are and how much they mean to you? But those words are useless if they exist in a vacuum. They need to be backed up by actions.
Dressing
Do you dress to please your spouse in colors and clothes that they like. Do you always try and look smart for them, or only when you’re going out? (Hmm, I might need to think about that one, since I was sitting here in my dressing gown when writing the draft of this earlier this morning. But it is a pretty dressing gown that Mick helped me pick.)
Dialogue
Do you communicate with your spouse, telling them how you are feeling and keeping the lines of communication open? Do you listen when they speak? Or have you already switched off thinking about what you want to say next or thinking you know them so well you know what they’re going to say and don’t have to listen?
Demeanor
Demeanor is the way a person interacts with others. What is the first impression your spouse makes on people? I know for example the impression others get of Mick is he is easy going and they’re right. What is the impression your spouse makes on you these days. Is it the same as it was when you first met and fell in love?
Dramatics.
How does your spouse normally behave? What do your spouse’s actions tell others about them? More importantly what do your actions tell others about the way you view your spouse?
Deeds
We reveal ourselves and our character by the things we do and the way we react, especially when under pressure. How does your spouse generally react under pressure? How do you react under pressure?
What do you feel about these 7 Ds? Did they make you think? Are they helpful to you in your marriage? As you look at these seven Ds, how do you and your spouse measure up in your marriage? What things might need to be changed?
Related blogs
Are You Walking Hand in Hand in Your Marriage?
Disagreements Aren’t Always Bad for Your Marriage
Who Needs Affirmations and Encouraging More?