Parents, if your special needs child is struggling in school–if he or she is miserable, and if things have been rough academically, let me make a suggestion. Take a careful look at your child’s teacher. I believe your child’s teacher can literally mean the difference between a successful year or a failed one. I’ve often heard other parents of special needs kids talk about the ups and downs they faced in the public (or private) school system over the years, and there always seemed to be a correlation with whether the child “clicked” with his teacher.
I’m not writing this blog to blame teachers for all of our children’s problems. We all know that most teachers are dedicated, caring, and certainly underappreciated. These teachers receive our children with a wide variety of challenges. They aren’t responsible for our children’s behavior problems, learning disabilities, and/or physical impairments. They do the best they can addressing these concerns. But it’s possible the particular teacher assigned to your child is just not a good fit. Especially in the scenario where a child is going to spend three to five years with the same teacher, parents should pay close attention to the dynamics of that relationship. Here are some ways to evaluate whether your child’s teacher is a good match for her needs:
- The teacher comes highly recommended. Hopefully you’ve heard from other parents, administrators, or therapists that your child’s teacher is tops.
- Your child looks forward to attending school each day. If your son or daughter happily bounds out the door to the bus, or smiles when talking about school experiences, that’s certainly a good sign. A child who cries and complains about school may not have a positive teacher connection.
- Your child believes, “My teacher likes me.” If you’re not sure whether your child feels this way, ask.
- The teacher has specific experience or training in dealing with your child’s disorder. He or she should certainly not question whether or not the condition is real or imply that bad parenting is the problem.
- The teacher isn’t afraid to give a lot of extra help and make adaptations. He or she isn’t offended by your suggestions that something new might be tried in the classroom. He or she doesn’t act frustrated or exasperated over your child’s behaviors.
- The teacher is playful, happy, encouraging, and motivating. He uses interesting teaching techniques that provide sensory stimulation.
- The teacher provides a safety net for your child. Your child should feel safe from bullying, teasing, exclusion, and should never feel inadequate. Student classwork or test results should never be compared aloud. There should not be test score competitions in the classroom.
- Your child is making significant progress in reaching academic milestones, or behavior problems are improving. Things should be steadily getting better, not worse.
- Go with your gut. Do you generally feel good about this teacher placement? Or do you have nagging concerns?
What should I do if I don’t think my child’s teacher is right for him?
As the parent of a special needs child, you have the right to pursue the best possible education for your son or daughter. First, do some research on other teachers available to your child. Make observations of those teachers during a school day. Talk to parents of children with similar disabilities. Connect through the foundation that represents your child’s disorder, or through your child’s pediatrician or specialist. Where are other children with similar challenges going to school, and how do they seem to be doing? Are these parents satisfied with their child’s teacher? Understand that a teacher switch may require that your child travels a farther distance to school. And you’ll have to convince your child’s current IEP team that your reasons for a change are legitimate.
Some parents simply decide that they are best suited to be their child’s teacher. If you’ve explored every option and your child just doesn’t seem to be getting his needs met, homeschooling may be an option. Read my blog: “Why I Homeschool My Son with Aspergers Syndrome: One Mother’s Story.”
If you are unhappy with your child’s teacher and don’t know where to turn, read my blog: When You Disagree with Decisions Regarding Your Child’s Education: What to Do.
Kristyn Crow is the author of this blog. Visit her website by clicking here. Some links on this blog may have been generated by outside sources are not necessarily endorsed by Kristyn Crow.