This is getting a bit ridiculous. As I sit here and think about kids who need homes, who need loving, permanent families, and I write about how much we have put into this adoption… classes, paperwork galore, references, background checks, research, discussion… we are finally at the point where we have an approved home study in hand and can be matched with a child, and what is happening???
Nothing… We wait, and we wait, and we wait.
We have had three potential matches presented to us. One we said “no” to. Two are still possibilities. But, what is going on with those two possibilities? Nothing…
In case you haven’t been following, here’s the rundown:
Match #1: Adoption coordinator contacted us about her, we went over her information, asked for more information, spoke to her case worker, decided it wasn’t for us, and… painfully… said “no”.
Match #2: Adoption coordinator contacted us, we said we were absolutely interested in learning more, and she put us in contact with her case worker. I talked to her case worker, who said she would call me back later that week. That initial contact was on January 10th… she hasn’t called back.
Match #3: Presented to us while we waited to hear from the case worker for match #2. I am unsure about this match, but Tom wants to know more about her. I reluctantly asked the adoption coordinator to put us in contact with her case worker. So far… we have heard nothing.
I know that it’s only been a couple of weeks since we contacted the case worker for match #2. I know that sometimes people go on vacation. I know that sometimes there is an emergency that keeps a person from making a phone call.
But… we have been told a number of times that since we are interested in adopting older children this process will go quickly. They said they could work with us right away. They said that if we were looking for younger children, or babies, that they wouldn’t even be working on our home study. But since we want to adopt teenagers they just jumped right on it!
But it seems as though, at this point, nothing is happening.
Oddly enough, I’ve already started to feel somewhat protective of these girls. I worry about what these girls, who might not ever even become a part of my family, might be going through right now. I find myself thinking, “How many placements has she been through since you first contacted me about her?” And… “What if we end up adopting her? How much worse are we making the transition by putting it off even longer, and moving her around even more??”
I am really optimistic about match #2, and not entirely opposed to match #3, and the more children that are presented to us the more I care about and worry about each and every one, and I just wish someone would call us.
I know that social workers are busy. I know that the system is overwhelmed. There is a part of me who wants to offer to do all of their busy work for them just so that they can free up that time to get children into permanent homes… mine included.
We haven’t been waiting that long, really. But it feels like we have been. And I was not expecting this to be so emotional. But it is. I just wish someone would call.