I am having a real hard time deciding what the right thing to do when it comes to dealing with my in-laws. I have read books, searched the internet looking for help. We have tried everything at least I think we did. Today I am sitting here thinking about the relationship with my in-laws and our kids.
Is life today so busy that no one has time to get to know our kids? Have times changed that much that everyone is so busy that they don’t have time for family?
While I was growing up we were always doing things with my extended family. We would have family dinners just for the heck of it; we would go to the lake with cousins just normal family things. At least I thought those were normal things.
When my sister and I grew older and she had her children I made a point to seeing them all the time, taking them out, watching them over night and playing at the zoo or park. Just normal Auntie type things to do.
Now I am having a real hard time adjusting to how our kids are treated by my husband’s side of the family. Maybe I just don’t understand why his family just does not have much to do with our kids. We know they don’t like me but is it fair to the kids that they are treated badly? They are awesome kids if I do say so myself.
We welcomed the kids to our family through foster to adoption placement 9 years ago. Our adopting kids instead of having them the good ole’ fashioned way, I do know there was some negative feelings about us choosing adoption on the part of some of the in-laws. One even said that the love for an adopted child is less than a birth child. Is this the reason that our kids are getting the short straw when it comes to extended family relationships? I can still count on one hand how many times their Aunts or Uncles on that side have taken the kids. The grand parents on that side only get one more hand to count their time with the kids. Did I mention all the extended family lives within an hour drive of us? So it’s not like we like clear across the country.