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Attachment Parenting-Responding

Most parents don’t sit around and plan how they will respond to their child’s needs but when attachment parenting an adopted child planning can really make a big difference. A child we have parented from birth will develop a way of letting us know what they need, and when they are happy or not. A child with only one set of parents from birth has consistent care and knows what to expect from their parents. A child with a strong feeling of safety and security will know and trust us to respond and to be consistent in the way we … Continue reading →

Attachment Parenting of Adopted Children.

It’s important as a parent to recognize the developmental milestones and expectations we have for our children. Most parents understand it takes awhile for a newborn baby to learn how to walk and talk so no one is worried when a newborn doesn’t get up and walk. That would be a silly expectation and most people understand that it is not a developmental milestone for a newborn to walk. Most people understand that walking on average happens around the age of one-year-old. The stages of Adoption have certain developmental milestones as well, however most people don’t understand what these milestones … Continue reading →

Part 1 Attachment Parenting of Adopted Children

Children with attachment difficulties often have a very different view of life and what it means to be part of a family. Attachment disorders occur when a child doesn’t have a safe and secure opportunity to learn how to attach during the first three years of life. There is a lot of information about attachment disorders, and the symptoms. The purpose of this series will be about parenting for attachment with our children. Parenting for attachment is a positive way of parenting any child and regardless of the type of attachment disorder a baby, toddler or child may have parenting … Continue reading →

Side Effects of Attachment Disorders (Part 9) Requesting.

All children want things and healthy children learn that asking means they often get what they have requested, and once in awhile the answer is, “no.” Children who grow up in ordinary environments learn that it is okay to ask and that the answer, “no” doesn’t mean there is something wrong with them–it just means, “no.” Child with attachment disorders seem to be one extreme or the other when it comes to requesting. Some children appear unable to ask for their needs to be met. These children often suffer from very low or broken self-esteems. Often a child who is … Continue reading →

How Common Are Attachment Disorders with Adopted Children?

There is no real statistical information about how common attachment disorders are in the general population. Research does indicate that attachment disorders do happen with biological children. In many cases, attachment disorders may happen as a result of prolonged hospital stays for the child, parent, or primary caregiver. There is also strong indication that children who grow up in neglectful or abusive homes fail to develop the needed skills to properly attach or relate to other people. Attachment disorders happen most frequently with adopted toddlers and children. Especially with children in foster care and state adoptions who have come from … Continue reading →

Very Basic Attachment Disorder Information.

An Attachment Disorder is a significant inability to bond and form meaningful connections with others in an honest, personal and non-manipulative fashion. There are three general factors used to determine if a child has an attachment disorder and how serious the disorder may be: Did the child experience significant disruptions in their natural bonding process during the first 12-18 months of life? This may include prolonged separations form their primary caregiver including long hospital stays for either the baby or the caregiver. It may include poor childcare services where the babies needs are not well met and there is little … Continue reading →

Adoption Transitions #7 From Orphanage or Institution to Home.

When a child has lived life in an orphanage or institution, the child has no real understanding of what family means. Children live a daily routine and most children in orphanages or institutions have no reference point for what family really means. One day the child is introduction to these people who are their new Mom and Dad. Anything the child has been told, about adoption, made no sense to them at the time. Cognitively, most children don’t understand they are getting a new family until the child finds themselves in the middle of transition. Don’t be surprised if your … Continue reading →

Family Books: Part of the State Home Study and Attachment Parenting.

Many caseworkers and other experts feel there are some things where pictures are more important than a thousand words. Family Books are a little bit like the letters and other things shown to a potential birth mother who might be considering placing her baby. The difference is that a Family Book may be used by the state as part of your home study and should be made to be given to the child before the transition starts. Families who are interested in adopting a child from the state foster care system may be asked to create a Family Book. If … Continue reading →

Teen Anxiety Linked to Parent-Infant Relationship

Parents want the very best for their baby. They put a great deal of effort into understanding what their baby needs and making sure that he or she gets it. Things change a bit when a child turns into a teenager and becomes difficult. Now, many parents are bewildered by the behaviors they see in their teen. When did the teenager become so nervous? It turns out that the quality of the parent-infant relationship is linked to teen anxiety. A study was done that involved 165 European-American children. These kids were from middle to upper-middle-class families. Each child was recruited … Continue reading →

Potty Time? Not Right Now

One of the big experiences that parents of toddlers encounter is potty training. This evening, I realized that Dylan really has not started potty training at all. He wants to wear training pants, but he does not want to stop playing outside or whatever else he is doing to let me know that he has to use the potty. He does not even tell me when he needs to be changed. It is probably a good thing that he has not started potty training, though, because I have not yet educated myself about how to do it. I want to … Continue reading →