Tag Archives: decision making

Using SODAS To Help Your Children Make Decisions

Having to make the right decisions is a problem our kids are faced with every day. And although we would love to be there to make all the decisions for our kids, they have to learn to make decisions on their own. We can, however, teach our kids how to make the right decisions by using a method known as SODAS. In , Common Sense Parenting, authors Raymond Burke and Ronald Herron explain how this method works. SODAS stands for Situation, Options, Disadvantages, Advantages and Solution . It can be used by kids (and adults) of all ages to solve … Continue reading →

Pulling In the Reins

This blog is about letting your kids make their own decisions and solve their own issues. Not in the traditional sense, no this blog is not about letting your kids decide what they want to do with their life, or what clothes they want to wear. It’s about letting them choose solutions for their misbehavior. It’s called pulling in the reins and it is a part of a larger set of techniques that fall under the heading of you solve it, or I’ll solve it and you won’t like my solution. Kind of blunt, but it works. This technique is … Continue reading →

Choosing Whether and How to Adopt Transracially–Our Decision

Adoption workers usually advise people considering transracial adoption to consider how their families and communities will accept and support a child of a different race, realizing that the child will not be a baby forever–transracial adoption means having a teen-ager and grandchildren of other races. The next question is whether the parents have resources to help the child feel pride in his/her culture, and whether the child will see role models who look like him/herself. We felt that the first issue was not a problem. (In fact my parents had nearly adopted an African-American boy themselves—that adoption never took place … Continue reading →

Four Words I Promised I Would Never Say As A Parent

In my pre-baby days I made a promise to myself that if and when I became a mother I would never, ever utter these four words. Because. I. Said. So. That was then, and this is now. It’s not that I say it a lot but I say it when necessary and I don’t feel guilty about doing so. Not like the first few times I uttered those words. And I know that some would argue that a child has a right to know why we make the decisions that we make and in most cases I offer an explanation. … Continue reading →

Teaching Good Judgment

The ability to make good choices and decisions is imperative. Yet many children do not learn this valuable skill. Parents can help teach their child good judgment by letting them make choices at a young age. Letting your young child choose what to wear, movie to watch, or food to eat gives them practice in making decisions within the safety net of home. Sometimes parents need to let their child make a choice and face the consequences. The other day my daughter wanted to eat a green onion. I told her that she wouldn’t like it but let her eat … Continue reading →

Side Effects of Attachment Disorders (Part 11) Decision-Making

A child who is dealing with an attachment disorder usually has a history of self-parenting. When children think that only their own conclusions are dependable, they stop viewing the advice and teaching of other people as valid or important. Children with attachment disorders may have decided that the only person they can depend on is himself or herself. No one is credible to the child and no one has anything important to offer a them–in his or her thinking. Some children with attachment disorders will decide to make all of their own decisions. Usually it turns out that their decision-making … Continue reading →